Observations from a Foreigner’s Perspective, Part Deux.

1. Carpet does not exist in homes. Tile in the living room, tile in the kitchen, tile in the bathroom, tile in the bedrooms, even tile on the stairs. Tile is everywhere. When you enter a home, you take off your shoes, only to put on another pair of shoes to walk around in, due to the fact that the tiled floors turn the soles of your feet black. So, I wonder, why even take off my shoes in the first place?

2. Ovens are rare. Apparently, not many people bake here because there are bakeries on practically every corner. And it’s so freaking hot here, who in the world would want to subjugate themselves to even more of it? Remember, no central air.

3. No such thing as intellectual property or copyright protection. Bootlegging in the night markets were blatantly obvious, often leading to hilariously mistranslated results.

4. The bathrooms here are ridiculous. There is no such thing as a shower curtain. Why? Well, it’s because you shower standing on the bathroom floor, with a hand-held showerhead. That’s right, there is no bathtub or shower enclosure. You have toilet, sink and a drain in the floor. For those who are lucky to have a bathtub, there is still no shower curtain. But there is still a drain in the floor. Because I am not accustomed to showering in this manner, all I have to say is thank goodness the entire bathroom, door included, is waterproof or else I would be paying for a whole lot of water damage. I hate hand-held showerheads. Another observation is that this country doesn’t seem to utilize this little invention called the exhaust fan. I just don’t get it.

5. Since we don’t have cable, I have not been able to watch anything in English. Whenever I am able to see some white people on the tele, I pause to try and listen to see what’s going on. It seems that the Taiwanese don’t really care about world news. The “world” news that I can seem to catch consists of Paris Hilton going to jail, the heat wave in Germany, some English vacation destination and the dumbass lawyer who contracted TB and may have passed it along to other people. Not really much in world news on this side.

6. People will look at you like you’re crazy when you’re walking around in the rain without an umbrella. People will look at you like you’re crazy when you’re walking around in the sun without an umbrella. Basically, always carry an umbrella.

7. Hotel staff will always remember the 6’5”, 300 pound white guy staying at their hotel. You never have to tell them which room you’re staying in; they just know.